;

Finally - I guess this is proof I have a life.

Lupe Fiasco - Never Forget You ft. John Legend
Destroyer - Chinatown


This morning, by chance, in a greasy spoon, I came across - THE SUN!

A newspaper famous for reporting on non-happenings that appear as happenings by characters from a self indulgent consumerist nightmare.

Not that I'm a regular reader of newspapers these days. I've got too much to do right now and therefore haven't got as much time to go over who plays where for Arsenal. Who plays where for any other team. Which team has bought who and how he plays, how he should play, where he should play and why he is playing. I don't have time for it anymore.

That... is... pretty... upsetting.

There was a time when, like anybody else I craved all that. Just look back at my correspondence from years gone by. Why this, why that, why the hell Bergkamp? Yes I questioned that and after seeing him for numerous games I still wonder that.

Bergkamp is a good place to start. We did have Dennis Bergkamp (you see what I did there? If not... bugger off) and we had him for longer than we should have had him. I think we massaged his ego. I think, by massaging his ego, some of our board and backroom staff massaged their egos. It was a case of "Wow. Look at us. We have a great player and he's still here."

We really should have grown and developed. I like to look at Ryan Giggs and Paul Scholes and think, wow... now that is football. In the premiership today we have absolutely quality players who watch what they eat, develop their craft and compete at the highest level in the world right now. We don't do that at Arsenal.

Is that wrong? Or... what is right?

I think... I will say... don't go to football looking for your moral compass or sense of morality. In fact, don't go to anything business oriented. It's ugly. It's devious. It's nasty and people do die horrible deaths because of the way we conjur and create and global market exploiting business today. This from the corner shop to the big supermarket and back again.

If we want morality we should... be honest... be truthful... be good... be kind. It's very simple. We all know how to do that. I know life becomes hard and the struggles become insurmountable but we can at least try and trying is the first step - or is doing the first step. Trying is always filled with effort while doing appears to be a state of nonchalant automation. Just do good.

Yet, as I read The Sun today and read Arsene Wenger has been having an affair (please spare me your criticism, I don't know how true it is - is anything truthful today?) I felt a slight sensation of content. For years I had looked up to Arsenal's words of harmony and integrity and balance believing we were a club who never went in the wrong direction. We had fans, many of whom applied and projected religious principles on the club and we wished to express that.

I don't believe there is anything wrong with that. As long as we hope for good - but not on the basis of hypocrisy I believe. Not at the expense of other clubs who also do good.

So I am saying, I hope we are seen as ugly as business is, where our players and managers are prone to extra-marital affairs and can't keep their todger firmly lodged behind grand sporting celibacy. I do. This is the ugly world of football as entertaining as it is so that the people of football, the fans can go out into the world and find good and hopefully never stop looking for it.

If I could say, I hate the fact people hide behind money and the arrogance and power that money gives people. Why can't these guys be honest. We gasp with horror covering our mouths with our holy hands at how dreadful all this is but it's happening everywhere. Are we so foolish. so hidden, so protected in our lives that this does not occur. I am not justifying it, I am not reasoning it, but my point is that this is wrong, this is brutal (if it occurred) and we should call it for what it is - the ugly image of football. The ugly image of life and gross, nasty, harsh, reminder of disappointment.

So I guess I have a life. I didn't know the caricatures created by The Sun were having affairs but I do know a whole lot worse in real life. Really ugly things. Really nasty ugly behaviour that occurs in real life.

Still, I take solace in the grand pockets of peace that exist around us.

My conscience is clear.

posted by Arsenal Muse @ 11/26/2010 02:06:00 PM